Lately the treasures on the BST have become more and more interesting
After sending my invitation to the masses, I woke up this morning and started driving south on I-15. I’ll admit it- I was nervous. This would be the longest run I’ve been on, since…well, I can’t remember. But it’s been a while.
When I parked my truck, I noticed a six pack of Natural Light Beer on the side of the Bonneville Shoreline Trail, right by the road. Sort of a misguided welcome, I
suppose. So I did what anyone would do in my situation- I put the beer in the back of my truck, tied my shoes in double-knots and headed out.
Either way, I started off from what I think is the southernmost point of the Bonneville Shoreline Trail. From the start, I was confused. There were “No Trespassing” signs all over the place- threatening, government-owned signs every mile or so, warning me that
one wrong move would send me into a bullet-riddled heap of overpronation. I ignored the signs, but kept a close eye out.
End of the line for the first section of the Bonneville Shoreline Trail in Payson
I had some slight IT Band pain at mile 3.5, which I ignored and willed into submission. At mile 5, I turned around after I saw a large fence that wasn’t easily scalable. It was also owned by the government and came across as somewhat threatening, what, with the signs and all.
Not to change the subject or anything, but as I’ve studied barefoot running (it’s an actual “thing”), I’ve learned that as human beings, we have a history of being persistance hunters, meaning that, instead of using guns, arrows, or what have you, we’d out-endure our kill. Human beings have the unique ability to sweat, which means that we don’t overheat as easily as animals. So while we’re easily outsprinted by tigers, bears and our little Sister Lindsay, we can catch up to animals in the long run with our awesome ability to endure.
Not to change the subject or anything, again, but this is what I was getting at in the first place- at one point on my run, a deer ran out onto the trail and we really surprised each other! I didn’t change my gait, but that deer took off like a…a really fast deer! It was really fast (super fast.) But I must have caught up to it at least 2 times, as I’d catch it taking a break on the trail. It couldn’t go left because there was a canal that would more than likely break its legs if it were to go down (I don’t know that- I’m just guessing.) I’m not sure why the deer didn’t break right, because it was just a mountainside. Deer know how to climb, so it seemed like a likely option. Either way, it was sort of a fun, modern-day persistance hunt (except that, when it comes down to it, I can’t really kill anything in good conscience- I’m a wuss that way.)
Saturday's trail
As I finally wound down my run, I finished off one more mile to get 11 for the day. And wouldn’t you know it, when I got back to my truck, that deer was waiting for me, cold Natty Light in hoof. I began to explain the complications of my religion, why I was turning down the beer and why I felt uncomfortable cooling down and stretching with a doe, when I realized that I should come up with a more honest way to tell the story of yesterday’s 11-mile run.
Let’s drink that beer after our marathon?
Nathan, as I sit here in the hospital, and the nurse is trying to get Gracie to take her medicine, Mark is holding her down, Gracie is throwing a fit, EVERYONE (but me) is trying to help get the motrin down her, I am sitting on the couch reading your blog about yesterdays run……….. and laughing. Ahhhh the ways we Nelsons can tell stories…… And make them up, kinda like how mom and dad ended up going on their 2nd date (ask about that story some time), also we are excellent with a run on sentence soooooooooo………. thank you and……………………….
Yeah, we have a way of making stories really, really long. But at the same time, it balances out all of the stories people tell that you wish would last a little longer.
Dude! Where’s my beer? Unbeknownst to you, I arrived for the run a few minutes early, wanted my post-race beverage to be nice and cold, deposited it in some snow, and went off to “stretch.” I get back to missing beer and no running partner. Fine. Whatevs. It quickly became clear that I was on my own, so I started out at a nice clip fueled by my anger over the stolen six-pack. I cut my run short, however, because I was frightened by the freakish hollering coming from the brush on the trail. Someone not-too-far-ahead-of-me-because-my-pace-has-dramatically-improved kept screaming things like “Die, deer. Die!!!” Of course, I didn’t know (until now) that this raving lunatic was saying “deer” and not “dear.” So, after just a short time, I turned around, returned to my car, called the police, and reported not only the man-stalking-his-wife but also the beer theft. (Sadly, the police didn’t give the beer issue much credence since I can only affort Natty Light right now. One of them went so far as to say that it wasn’t even “real” beer….. So, I lifted another six-pack, one beer at a time from multiple 7-11s, and drank them as I drove home just to prove to Mr. Payson Police that I can, actually, get drunk on Natty Light.)
@Kaye: I did not yell, “Die, deer, die.” You were close. I yelled “Die, dear deer, die!” That dear, deer dared me for the last time, but was like a brother to me.